Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Vacationing at Friends' or Family Homes

Summer means vacations. If you live or have a home in a desirable vacation area it is THAT TIME OF YEAR!

Do you know what I am talking about? Friends and relates may be looking to mooch or crash with you this summer.

Here are my guidelines:
1.     No more than 4 days and 3 nights total.
2.     No pets.
3.     No unknown traveling buddy that comes with.
4.     No use of a car, rentals are available.
5.     If you are taking a red eye home you will be dropped off at 9 PM.
Likewise if you are taking a really early flight, there are cabs or public transportation.

Do these guidelines seem strident? I am opening up my house and extending hospitality. I want family and friends to visit but I work. I run a business. Come Thursday and leave Tuesday and we can all have lots of fun. Really we can!

Of course there are exceptions. In my case, my sister has a very small footprint so she can stay longer. Some other guests, 3-4 days is the limit. A weekend is truly enough for some other guests who have large footprints.

Then there are guests who try to force their way, into your home and they are turned back. This becomes awkward but in my experience it is well worth a few minutes of awkwardness and firmness than staying 3 days holed up in your bedroom. Just saying…

So what makes a good houseguest, and what am I talking about large and small footprints? Here is how a guest can have small footprints:
1.They blend in well with your routine.
2. They give you options on what they want to do.
3. They contain their belongings to their room.
4. They help out.
5. They are appreciative of the time spent together.

Here are traits of big footprint guests:
1.They have a routine that you must adjust to. A good example, they run 5 miles every morning and an early start can’t occur until they get their run in.
2. They have no plans but don’t want to do any of your choices.
3. Their shoes, coats and clothes are all over the house.
4. They mistake your home for a B&B.
5. They just want to crash at your house because they can’t afford a ‘real’ vacation.

Have you turned away guests? How have your experiences been?

11 comments:

Suzanne Fluhr said...

We have one family member who makes plans about when he wants to show up without consulting us. Then, once he arrives, you can make a nice company dinner only to be informed that he won't be eating because he wants to go out and eat a cheese steak. (We're from Philly). But, it's hard to know whether this person is truly clueless or just garden variety inconsiderate.

Carol Cassara said...

These are great rules and they would be responsible for saving a bunch of friendships, I'd think. Some guests are totally tone deaf about the normal courtesies. To this I would add, "don't come empty handed and take the family out for a nice dinner".

Haralee said...

Yes Suzanne there is that!

Rena said...

I love this!!! I live very close to Myrtle Beach and every summer I get bombarded with visitors. I love company but these rules are just what I need! I have alot on my plate and sometimes it is just to much. Great article will share it...with everyone!Thanks

Haralee said...

Thanks Carol, excellent additions! I had a friend bring cat toys and I was so thrilled by her gesture and thoughtfulness.

Haralee said...

Thanks Rena. Myrtle Beach is beautiful so I can imagine! A rental car at the airport with GPS is the perfect way for a guest to arrive. Also if they are willing to listen to advice. Here in Oregon distances can be great without services, truly no services. Trust me no one wants to get a text that their guests are out of gas or lost in some remote area when you told them no services for 40 miles means no wheresville!

Kathy @ SMART Living 365.com said...

Hi Haralee....these are SO great. I completely agree that your guidelines are important for house guests. Of course even when you let them know what you expect, it doesn't always happen. That's when it's up to us to never invite them back. Fortunately, my sister lives close by and she'll let ANYONE stay with her so we are often off the hook. Thanks for your great ideas.

Haralee said...

Thanks Kathy. You made me laugh. I have given house rules and some think they are suggestions and then wonder why we refuse their entrance to our home again!

Diane Stringam Tolley said...

I've thought about rules for house guests, but never actually put them into point form. These rules are wonderful! We live in the frozen north and have very few people show up to visit. And those that do are family and really just want to crash here and then go to see friends they really like. It's uncomfortable from start to finish. The last few times they've suggested coming, we're always busy . . .

Haralee said...

Thanks for commenting Diane. Smart to be busy and yes the fish rule is a good one!

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